india tweets

About six months back, I had posted a tweet about 'bhut jolokia', the hottest chilli in the world, to which some Americans have taken fancy.

Then I had mentioned that it would not be long before the CIA realised that “administering” it the wrong way would get even the most hardened criminals to 'sing'!

Well, for once, Indian defence scientists have beaten the Americans, a bit differently though. They have developed a grenade filled with bhut jolokia. Its smell is so pungent that it will numb and immobilise terrorists and enemy troops. Work is also on to use it in teargas shells and as a powder that can be used by women to protect themselves.

Hope Haldirams and others take note that there might be significant cost savings if they use it as a food ingredient!

The humble 'baingan' is sure making waves. Even as the BT Brinjal controversy rages, comes the news that farmers in Gurgaon have found a new way of not only multiplying the yield of ordinary brinjals but also improving their shape!

These farmers have discovered that brinjals, like humans, love alcohol. They sprinkle alcohol in the soil right from the time they sow the seed, and the plants respond by increasing their yield manifold.

Agricultural scientists, however, believe that there is no scientific basis for the claim as alcohol evaporates within 10 minutes of spraying.

Brinjals can't talk. But, as the farmers have discovered, they love their 'chhota' too. And how! The next time you feel a little tipsy after having 'bhartha', know that the brinjals came from Gurgaon.

Those accused of being mule-headed need no longer take offence.

A mule has done something that will do any master proud. It brought the body of his master, a jaggery seller, to his residence after he was shot dead by some unidentified assailants at Hathwala village of Panipat district in Haryana.

The incident occurred on Wednesday night when the mule cart arrived in the village and stopped outside the residence of the jaggery seller. The animal started whinnying to draw the attention of villagers when no one came near it for a while. Noticing something unusual, people came close to the cart to find the body of juggery seller in a sack. They informed the police, which took the body to hospital for post-mortem. Earlier, the police treated it a road accident. A murder case has now been registered.

Forget Viagra. All that you need to boost your sex drive is a bit of the Sun, if researchers at the Medical University of Graz in Austria are to be believed.

According to a study done by them, the levels of the male sex hormone testosterone rise accordingly with doses of Vitamin D, and men with more of the vitamin have more of the hormone. Both decrease during winter, starting October and reach the lowest level in March.

An hour of free sunshine can boost a man's testosterone level by as much as 60%!

Something obviously is wrong somewhere. If the findings are correct, Indians males who are forever bathed in the Sun, should barely be able to keep it down. Can anyone spot so many Don Juans around? Imagine the tourism potential!

This Twitter-inspired idea which was born on August 23, 2009, is 200 tweets old already. This is the 200th tweet.

The success of Twitter shows that there is a hunger for tiny bits of info that give a glimpse of a bigger picture. 140 characters are too few to complete it. But in 140 words it can be done, as the tweets in this microblog have shown.

Thanks to Manju, Ugich Konitari, BK Chowla, Happy Kitten, Gopinath, Sagarone, Krishna, Jeena, Sraboney, Mavin, Solilo and Mahesh, names in descending tweet-order, india tweets has already achieved an Alexa ranking of <300,000. Thanks guys for giving form to the idea with your high quality efforts. Keep tweeting!

If you want to be an author, contact any existing author. The more the tweets and the greater their variety, the more popular will your microblog become.

Two women, Meera and Gita and their newborns, at The District Women's Hospital, Sitapur, UP, were alloted a single bed, and they slept head-to-feet to maximise the available space. Meera, turned, caused the newborn of Geeta to fall down, and the child lay there, hurt and crying for an hour and a half, despite calls from Gita. It was later declared dead, hours after its birth.

Rural children in the state face an 80 per cent higher risk of dying before their fifth birthday compared with urban children, with overcrowding and lack of care at hospitals a major reason.

Madhu Koda, erstwhile CM, Jharkhand, hiding in the ICU of a hospital due to “abdominal pain and nausea”, emerged shamelessly, saying he had no time to meet the Income tax authorities who accuse him of a Rs 2000 crore scam.

Nauseating.

Remember how King Pandu was cursed when he mistook Rishi Kindama and his wife for deer and shot an arrow, killing them when they were making love?

Selva Kumar, a 34-year old farmer from Sivaganga, Tamil Nadu, did something similar when he was 18. He stoned to death mating dogs and hung their carcasses from a tree.

A few days later, his hands and legs got paralysed and he lost hearing in one ear. Doctors were clueless.

Finally, an astrologer told him that he was cursed by the spirit of the dogs he had killed and the only way to undo it was to marry a bitch and live with her.

He did that with 10-year old Selvi who was dressed in an orange sari, in a ceremony befitting a beautiful Hindu bride.

No word yet on the honeymoon.
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Also read: Man rapes bitch, to be tried

Madhabi Khatoon, 7, of Murshidabad district , rolling beedis since she was five, now rolls 400 a day, working 14 hours a day.

She is at risk for tuberculosis, postural and eye problems, anaemia, lung and skin diseases. Continuous beedi rolling and exposure to tobacco, makes fingertip skin thin, and they are unable to roll beedis by the age of 45. They have to resort to begging as they know no other trade or occupation

1 out of every 6 girls dies before her 15th birthday.

1 out of 4 girls is sexually abused before the age of 4.

Death rate among girls below the age of 4 years is higher than that of boys and 53% of girls in the age group of 5 to 9 years are illiterate.

You think she knows what Nov 14 is ?

Experience says that our Meteorological department simply cannot predict things. They give scientific reasons once the event is over. In other countries, the cyclone makes a landfall where they say it will, and in time, as predicted.

That Cyclone Phyan was supposed to make landfall Thursday (today) early morning was announced. Folks in Mumbai were also advised to stay indoors , offices and schools were let off. After landfall, a good 48 hours of heavy gusty rain was predicted for Mumbai on Thursday.

Maybe the cyclone knew this. It simply whizzed past Mumbai on Wednesday, at 2 pm , more than 12 hours early. Then it even hoodwinked Gujarat , and spoiled predictions by reaching Rajasthan, all weakened.

Thursday, scheduled for heavy rain, is shining with bright sunlight in Mumbai.

Maybe it didn't like the name. Cyclone Rahul, anybody ?

Everyone has heard of or witnessed a snake-mongoose fight as each tries to sting/bite the other to death. But man and snake fighting like this?

This is what happened between a 25-year old gardener and a snake on Saturday in a park just outside Bhubaneswar, Odisha. Furious at being bitten by a snake, Ramesh Kumar Jamda grabbed it, tore it apart, chewed parts of its body and, hold your breath, even swallowed the flesh.

After the 'fight', Jamda fell unconscious and the snake died on the spot. The former was taken to the local hospital and regained consciousness after treatment. “I was very angry after the snake bit me on my finger”, says the survivor, “I chewed parts of its body to take revenge”!

It is not clear whether the snake was poisonous. Jamda certainly was!

Want an exotic, even wild, pet? Ask your local government to replicate what the government of Punjab is doing.

Residents of Punjab are being allowed to adopt wild animals and birds in major zoos of the state. For a fee, of course, ranging from Rs 400 to Rs 200,000, for a period ranging from a few months to a year. This step has been taken to overcome a financial crunch.

Those who adopt a pet will have a right to check their pets and their living conditions. They will be invited as special guests during various celebrations and appointed as ex-officio members of the zoo's development society. They will also be issued free passes for their families and five additional persons to visit the zoo four times a year.

Environmentalists and residents are quite enthusiastic about the move.

Picture: The Telegraph

Lissome models on the catwalk are soon going to have 'weighty' competition.

A buffalo catwalk show, the first ever, was organised in Madhepura, Bihar recently. Over a dozen well dressed buffaloes took part to display their beauty and style. Scores of people gathered to watch the show in open fields. A buffalo named Radha was declared winner and an award of Rs 500 was given to her owner.

According to Prabhat Kumar, the man behind the show, the show was organised to draw the attention of the people to the plight of the animals and to make them care for and respect them.

Buoyed by the success of the show, Kumar plans to organise buffalo catwalks at national and international levels! We may soon have dress designers for buffaloes too.

This happens only in India!

This sizzling hottie from Assam is sure making waves.

Bhut Jolokia, also known as Naga Jolokia, is the hottest chilli in the world. Measured at more than one million SHU, it is twice as hot as its nearest competitor, California's Red Savlina. It is called “bhut” because one turns ghostly (bhut ban jaata hai) after eating it.

Americans, always fascinated by anything that is the biggest, largest etc have, not surprisingly, taken fancy to it. Chilli-heads are already growing Jolokia in hot houses. A sauce made with it has been aptly named “Naga-sore-ass” while another one is “Kiss my Bhut”!

It won't be long before the CIA realises that “administering” Bhut Jolokia the wrong way will get even the most hardened prisoners to sing. Move over Sodium Pentathol. The real truth serum is here! Human Rights?!

Thula Borah, a 63 year old man, has remained indoors since 1962. And that is not because Chinese soldiers almost overran Deurigaon, the village near Tezpur, where he lives. As per his neighbours, it is because he could not digest his mother's scolding for failing in his Class X exams.

All efforts to make Borah come out of his self imposed confinement have failed.He survives on food his kin pass to him through a window. His neighbours say he was in his senses till a couple of years back

While this is an extreme case, there is certainly a lesson in it for parents who unknowingly traumatise their children in varying degrees by piling on more pressure than they are wired to handle.

I am sure there are many Borahs out there who have gone “indoors” mentally.